All Done Sad Face

As you may remember I have written briefly about issues we've had with Rooney hitting/pushing other kids. Since he has started really talking we don't have as many problems but there are still times when his best communication tool is a foot to someones face. As you can imagine that does not go over very well.

For awhile there it seemed Rooney was constantly in a time out at indoor playground or we were leaving because it was just too much. I started to realize that 1. he's a toddler and he is getting frustrated and cannot express himself 2. he's a boy and he needs to be more physical 3. that he was generally not being malicious and that all these time outs were really just for the benefit of the other parent. It seemed to make the victim's parent feel better and I decided I am not punishing my child to make someone else feel better. Rooney will still get an occasional timeout (although almost never at home) but now it is for reasons such as blatant disobeying and outright malicious behavior.

Now I am focusing on trying to teach him empathy and show him the consequences of his actions. For instance, if he pushes down a kid who he thinks is trying to get a toy he's playing with, and that kid gets hurt, I want him to see that his action of pushing and knocking that kid over hurt the other kid. I know that his intent was not to hurt the other kid but was trying to get that kid away from him. I also know that he doesn't really get that he hurt them yet but I think he is starting to. He is saying "No" more now or "Get Out" (which he picked up from the dogs). In addition to being able to verbalize his desires better we are finding a way for Roon to verbalize his emotions as well.

I think my sister started this and it seemed like a great idea to me. She was doing different faces with Rooney. Happy Face, Sad Face, Mad Face etc. While doing the faces Roonster really reacted to them and was upset when Annie did the Sad Face. Now Rooney will tell me if he has a Sad Face or a Happy Face. After being hurt and had been crying he will often tell me "All done Sad Face. All done crying" and then he will be back to his usual happy self. I love this! I really think it is a great way for him to express that how he is/was feeling and that he can decide/verbalize when he is done. I have also been using this to let Rooney know if he is doing something that is upsetting me. I can tell him that he is giving me a Mad Face. He tells me "No, Sad Face". It seems he knows that Mad is the extreme and it is better if I just get a sad face. Generally he stops doing whatever it is though regardless if I have a Mad Face or just a Sad Face.

Sometimes we just use the faces as a game. He really enjoys doing the Happy Face and seems to excel at that one. I think because he is generally a pretty happy kid and it is hard for him not to smile. Below is Rooney making all his faces for me.

Happy Face	Sad Face
Crying Face	Mad Face

No fooling around. Rooney's got to get on the dance floor

Beside being in touch with his emotions now Rooney is also grasping his artistic side. As you've seen in previous videos Rooney can really cut a rug. In this latest video Rooney now has a dance partner, Kaibre.